Teen-AGEr

Wrote this a long time back, but somehow, this paper became part of who i am today. I know that no matter how disappointing things may seem at the time, if u look back at it, it just becomes a small, though, very important piece of your life. So here goes......

Being 17, its hard not to think that your crush( not the first one, of course) is "The One". The man in your life, meant only for You. Its hard b'coz, all the emotions that emerge on getting just a glimpse of the guy, makes you want to burst......out of joy, i guess!!
You can almost feel your cheeks burn with the blush turned full on. Your friends ask if u've just run a mile in the hot summer sun, but that cant be it, its the middle of December. You cant really describe the feeling, and I guess its just natural to feel betrayed when that Mr. Right just walks by, totally oblivious to your presence........or nods a greeting like you are just some ordinary gurl, no fault of his there, of course!
All the same, you definitely cant take the fact that HE thinks you are after all, ordinary. You need to feel special, even beautiful...just by the way he looks at you. So whats going wrong.....why cant he be a little more sensitive, you wonder.
You want it more than anything that he accepts you, sees you for all you are, that the likeness be mutual......so why doesn't it happen? Is there a 'Don't bother me' sign hanging from my neck???
I don't know if u've felt this way, but i definitely do....maybe we're not looking at the right person....maybe its not time yet......maybe.....maybe.....nothings for sure. And it hurts most when he goes and hooks up with another 17 yr-old gurl. I don't know that feeling yet coz my "guy" seems to be happy being unattached for now....so maybe thats my luck. Don't know yet whats in store for me. Hope its something good. So ill cross my fingers (maybe not hope to die, coz i'm just 17, u know)..... n wish for the best!

SO......its been 5 years since, and I can tell you, there was some serious heart-break..... but i moved on......n lived to tell!!!